What Happened Then

So this is a story I heard, more or less, with a few minor changes:

I’m just a middle-aged guy, a little on the heavy side, a nose like a beak, yeah okay, not your type, but I’m a nice guy, all the same, and I’m looking to meet someone. So I go to bars, and you know, say nice things to ladies. Nothing. No one’s into me. It’s bad. It’s like everyone’s saying you’re not my kind. So I put an ad in the Personals: 50 + man looking for sweet young thing. I don’t say exactly that, but I get my message across. But no one calls, so I start checking around on my own. And I see this chick . . . Well, there was more than one. But I see them in this window, and at first it’s just a glimpse. I know. I just know. This my chance So I go on in, and I try to get the girls to talk to me. The first is a total failure. You know how that goes. And the second? She doesn’t seem to mind. Too much. Not like she’s walking away, but she doesn’t answer. So I get my nerve up. I give her a pick on the cheek. Just a peck. No big deal, right? You’d have thought I killed her. What happened then . . . Yeah, okay, so someone made a little video of it. I guess he thought it was funny--watching the fat guy after the chicks. http://www.eecs.berkeley.edu/~jima/free.mov