Teaching Physics, Physics Humor, and the Perfect Excuse

Is there such a thing as physics humor? S asked me the other day.

I don't know. I hope so. I mean, I did write a book of physics humor.

And if I were teaching physics, I'd need a sense of humor. And a lot of compassion.

Students (and not just physics students), btw, make up the most wonderful excuses.

I have been wondering lately if there is such a thing as a perfect excuse.

If so, there should be a prize for it. Every year. A national competition.

But the perfect excuse would have to be subtle. And convincing.

Like a lover. It should convince you it is telling the truth, that it has nothing else to offer.

If it comes on too strong, you won’t believe it. Or if it is too weak, too vague, who would listen to it? Or forgive it for all its trespasses . . .

No, the perfect excuse has to be just the right size and shape and temperature. And it must move at the right speed and rhythm . . .

so that you move with it into an alternate universe where all answers are yes. Yes! Yes! Yes!

And all endings are happy.