Last night we went to First Night in Canfield.
Brady's Leap played--they were great. Really.
But I discovered I have a new allergy.
If I hear "Somewhere Over the Rainbow"
(which I heard 3 times)
one more time, I will go into convulsions.
I might stop breathing. Someone will have to dial 911.
Between that song and that Celine Dion song
from the Titanic . . .
I'm sorry, but this is a serious problem . . .
No matter how well the songs are sung . . .
Allergies, my doctor told me a few years ago,
are very serious.
You should not laugh at them.
My mother didn't believe in them either.
She used to make me eat crab, shrimp,
and lobster, even when my eyes watered
and my throat itched. Just three more bites.
After all these were delicacies.
It was rude to refuse them.
I learned you could eat anything,
even if your throat itches
if you suck ice during and after.
You have to swallow chunks of it.
And keep swallowing. Ice cream headache and all.
I told Mom the doctor said I might die of an allergy.
Mom was indignant.
That's why kids are allergic to everything now.
Their mothers are soft on them.
I don't know. I really don't.
But no matter how fine a delicacy it might be . . .
I'm thinking if your eyes water,
and you start gagging
and people are looking at you funny,
you should probably stop doing whatever you're doing.
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