Suzanne called last night from El Salvador because she had just returned with her youth group from some kind of religious event. The minister had given a sermon on the difficulty of getting into heaven. She called it his sperm sermon. Between giggles Suzanne quoted him:
Do you know how hard it is to get into heaven, the minister asked.
Do you know how bad the odds are for any one of you?
Well, let me put it in terms you teenagers can understand.
I know what's on your minds.
So let me tell you about heaven and sex.
Because I'm talking about sperm here.
Yes, sperm. And I want each of you to imagine
how many sperm come out of a single ejaculation.
60,000 is what I've read. Yep. Imagine that.
Now imagine all those sperm trying to fertilize one egg.
But only one lucky sperm ever becomes a man or a woman.
That's right, each one of you here today is one of the lucky sperm
walking around on human legs.
Many times not even one of the 60,000 even make it
through those Pearly Gates.
Have you ever wondered why?
No, I bet you haven't.
Well, I have . . .
13 minutes ago